THE LITTLE BLACK BOOK.

This has probably been overtaken by technology what with Android phones connecting and synchronising every detail on your phone to your email address, making it surprisingly easy not to miss your phone as much after you lose it as you can easily back up all your documents and contacts to your email address which you can access from everywhere and at any time. Well, that is the now. But about ten years ago when the cell phone was just getting to every citizen in our country and not everyone could afford one, I would use my mother’s phone to call the numbers on my little black book. It was a must-have just like the little black dress is a must have for all the women in the world.

That little black dress does is one for all occasions and so is the Little Black Book. You would record in it, numbers of your friends’ girlfriends, boyfriends, lovers, schoolmates, former classmates that you would run into on the street, yes, and very many people. If you are a fan of the famous Sitcom Two and a Half Men or Friends, you would have observed Charlie and Joey respectively at their game. I am definitely not comparing myself to them J, but then, you can easily associate with what I am telling you right now.

I was currently just shifting towns when, as I was gathering up my stuff, I found mine, my little black book. I still keep in touch with most of the people in the book, but there was one I had not seen, or kept in touch with for over 9 years, I decided to call him up. Ooh!  what a surprise I got. It was a most pleasant conversation.  It was amazing how much things have changed and they still stay the same. We are living in different towns now, but I can’t wait to meet him up and chat over a cup of coffee.

Yes, the little black book, brought me back my bird that flew away (rhetorical statement)

Where is your little black book?

Friends & Weddings.

This weekend, I was thinking about my future. Now, my wedding should be in September because it is my favourite month. I would have loved 21, but this year that date is not available. So tentatively the date is September 20th. I was now thinking about my bridesmaids. The criteria I would use to choose, who would be my maid of honour among my four friends. These are all people I have known for years on end and some of them I have a long standing relationship with them. Some of them have seen me at my worst and have always been there for me no matter what.

How do you define "always been there"? For some, this might be defined as the time when all the good times were shared. Others, when all the bad times were shared. Yet others would take it to mean that when they needed help the friend was there to sort them out. For me however, my definition is one friend of mine, Eve. We have fought, insulted each other, broken up for years, got back together and sometimes laughed over our fights. The last fight was so bad we were texting each other as late/early as 4 am. That was  just two years back. 

Eve would definitely be my best maid. Simply because, I can rely on her as much as I do rely on my family. Despite our fights, she has continually offered me unconditional support and love. I have not been a good friend to her at all. This here today is t o say thank you and to be grateful for your (Eve) support. Unconditional love and everything that you have given me. That I am here today, that I make the choices I do, that I am able to walk with a smile and chin up, that I am able to dance like I do, that I laugh out loud when I remember what we have done, I am grateful to God that I met you and I am grateful to you that for sticking around despite my errors and misdemeanours. Here and now, I officially ask you...

I hope you say yes, because I know deep down in my heart that if you say no, I will die of a broken heart. 

Direct Attack!!

Over the years, we have met different types of people. Over the years we have learnt to deal with these people. Over the years, when we meet these people, they leave us speechless and uncharacteristically shocked. Over the years we have learnt that we are not all the same and things change, people are born, grow up, mature and die... We have learnt to be patient, tolerating, kind, generous, mad, violent, happy, sad and we have learnt how to mask our feelings and maintain relationships. We have learnt to live and love.

As a way of life, some people are superior than others and no one can complain, we are not the same and never will we be. If we were all similar, I am sure it would be boring. We have self-righteous people who believe that their way is the way or no way at all. Its certainly not a bad thing. We have always been thought that the customer is always right, even if he is confused, misinformed, rude, stubborn, changeable and even downright stupid, but he is always right. Now that is the person we are talking about.

Most of the time we are always trying to be in another person's shoe so as to understand the situation and be in a better position to assist and to empathize if we are no able to offer any help. You can be amazed at what just being there does. However, what about those who are vain, what do you do? What about the people who celebrate the joy of others' pain? What about our day to day bullies?I was listening to someone I knew narrate a story about his friend's ex-girlfriend, the reason this particular story is etched in my mind, is because of the look that he had on his face and the grin he had on his face and that was the turning point of my relationship with Road Hog. It was then that I decided I was not cut out to be mean and indifferent.

In summary, Road Hog met this beautiful stunning professional woman and turned her into a single mother living at home with her parents. Road Hog grinned and I swear I thought I heard a laugh/snort come out of him when he told me that. It deeply saddened me and trust me, that was the moment I cut ALL ties with Road Hog. I was left uncharacteristically speechless. At that point, I questioned my choice of friends. Do I want caring, soulful brothers or do I want, self-righteous, obnoxious and controlling brothers?

There's a common saying "Show me your friends and I'll tell you the kind of person you are."  I would choose not be Road Hog's friend but you can. We are all molded in different ways, react to certain things differently and build each other differently. I can be a killer and you a lover, I can be a mother and you a disciplinarian. Yes, life has taught has many things in many way with many people. Be careful whose head you step on, or whose hands you break, you might need the same head and the same hands to catch you when you fall. Do you want to be or do you want to  whatever makes you happy.


I am not perfect and I am not great. I am perfect in someone else's eyes and I am great in someone else's eyes. I love that I am surrounded by people who are understanding, loving, caring and though they reprimand me sometimes, but I now know that it's because they want the best for me.

I am surrounded by soaring eagles. :-)

A Dedication

My friend told me that I was fond of writing SOB stories. But that is what I felt at the time and most definitely, my life revolved around those particular incidences. To me, they were not really SOB stories but true facts about life and sometimes very sad realities that happened between friends, lovers and neighbours.
I could now start complaining about how some people do not want to be my friends of Facebook or how someone followed me on Twitter then un-followed me. No, today, no negatives, just lots of love.

A couple of months ago, I decided to throw myself back into the dating game. My first try wasn't so good prompting me to take a lean back and review what it is I wanted. Well, I have many witnesses that can attest to my glowing-ness :-). It is that good.

We met at one morning at a hotel in Nairobi, it was all business and I had no intentions to take it further (or so I thought at the time). If you told me then that I would be this happy, I would not believe you, not at any one time.
We spoke for a bit and I went my way. I remember looking at him and thinking to myself "what a dashing fellow". Well, after our brief meeting, I left feeling crestfallen knowing that I would not see him again for a long time or when the need arose for a similar meeting. I did well to remind myself that, I was taking a lean back.

A couple of days later he emails me, then calls me. I remember I had my heart down at my feet, it was racing so fast I just could not believe it, I was speaking with him on a totally unrelated matter. We spoke for a couple of minutes and afterwards, I went to bed just replaying our conversation in my mind over and over again. THAT, that was the beginning. We kept in touch day after day, calls, chats, emails and if I could describe him, I would say he is amazing in every way. He is thoughtful and makes me laugh. He talks to me and his smile is infectious. REALLY it is.

So soon! Yes, I question myself too. But how can you NOT fall in love with a writer, a poet, he has the tunes to my hearts desires, the music to my soul, the passion that drives me wild. He is my mind's utmost want and need. When he says " Ninakupenda" Swahili word meaning "I love you", I literally melt. And you know what, that's not what won me over. He won me over when he  told me "the setting of the sun today reminds me of the sunrise you are in my life. I already look forward to tomorrow because of you." That just took my breath away.

Sigh!